What is mediation?

Mediation is a conflict resolution process in which individuals meet with a trained mediator to assist them with the resolution of a dispute. The mediator, a trained neutral third party, acts as an impartial facilitator to help parties reach a voluntary agreement where the parties have control over the outcome.

How much does mediation cost?

The cost of mediation depends on a variety of factors including the complexity of issues to be resolved, geographic location, mediator experience, and the number of sessions needed to resolve the issue(s). The cost / benefit of engaging in the process based on your circumstances is worth considering when determining whether to proceed with mediation or litigation.

What co-parenting issues can be mediated?

All co-parenting issues can be mediated. Mediation is a good place to resolve co-parenting matters because it puts the parents, and not the Court, in control of the outcome. Co-parenting issues for mediation may include parenting time, education decisions, healthcare decisions, extra-curricular activities, religion, travel, significant other introduction, communication methods, child support and child related expenses, college contribution, substance abuse, and more.

Mediation on parenting matters is mandatory in some states before the Court will get involved. However, even if it is not mandatory in your State, mediation is generally faster, less expensive and gives you more control over the outcome than going to Court.

Can I mediate my divorce?

Yes. Mediation is an alternative dispute resolution process which helps individuals resolve issues including divorce and family matters. A divorce mediation can resolve issues related to all aspects of the divorce including, but not limited to, parenting time, parenting decision making, child support, child related expenses, spousal support, marital and non-marital property determination, asset distribution, debt allocation and college contribution.

How do I prepare for mediation?

Here are a few ways to prepare for mediation:

1. Understand the mediation process before agreeing to mediate. Mediation is an Alternative Dispute Resolution process used by individuals to help resolve disputes. Be sure to understand the process including, what mediation can and cannot do, before agreeing to proceed.

2. Research mediators and get to know their style. Mediators have different styles and not every mediator is a good fit for your divorce or family matter. There are both attorney and non-attorney mediators who can resolve a divorce or family matter. It is important to connect with the mediator to understand the mediator’s education, experience and process before you engage their services.

3. Prepare, prepare, prepare. Preparing for mediation will save you a lot of time and money during the process. You should go into mediation with at least a basic understanding of (a) the issues to be addressed and (b) the information helpful to address the issue (e.g., appraisal, school calendar, income). If you need guidance, then consider working with an attorney to prepare you for mediation though having an attorney is not required to participate in the process.

4. Set realistic expectations. Your issue was created overtime and it may take time to reach a resolution. Be realistic about the amount of time it may take to resolve the issues. Setting unrealistic time constraints will not help resolve the issues but rather will set you up for failure. That doesn’t mean you should continue to engage in an unproductive process but it does mean to give the process a realistic amount of time to work.

5. Have a positive attitude. Problem solving takes cooperation, creativity, trust and respect. Having a positive attitude, even when things are difficult, will help move the process along in a productive way.

How many mediation sessions will we need?

Not every mediation is the same and will not require the same amount of sessions to resolve the issues. The number of sessions will depend on several things including the complexity of issues to be resolved, the number of issues to be resolved, the cooperation of the participants, and any special circumstances (e.g., domestic violence, substance abuse, health considerations).

If you are considering mediation to resolve your divorce or family matter, then speak with the Mediator about your unique situation to better understand the process and estimate the number of sessions which may be required. However, keep in mind that it’s better to focus on and engage in a productive resolution process than to focus on the number of sessions. The goal for mediation should be to resolve a divorce and family matter in a confidential and cost effective manner with the participants, and not the Court, having control over the outcome.

Do I need a lawyer for mediation?

No, a lawyer is not required for mediation with Dovetail Conflict Resolution. However, a Mediator, even an Attorney Mediator, cannot provide legal advice during the mediation process, does not represent either party in mediation and, cannot file documents in Court on behalf of the participants.

An attorney may be helpful in some cases where there are complex financial matters or unique parenting situations where legal advice will help during the negotiation process. If you are considering mediation, then speak with the Mediator about attorney assisted and non-attorney assisted mediation as part of your process.

We don't agree. Is mediation a waste of time?

No, mediation is not a waste of time. Mediation is a conflict resolution process designed to help individuals resolve disagreements. Mediation is a process to help individuals identify their needs and interests in order to reach a resolution. The Mediator, a third party neutral, works with the individuals by facilitating a conversation to help bridge the gap between them.

If you are addressing a divorce or family matter, then mediation is a viable option to help you resolve parenting and financial matters in a confidential and cost-effective process which gives the individuals, and not the Court, control over the outcome. It is worth a try.

What's the "secret" to a successful mediation?

YOU are the secret to a successful mediation! Here are 4 tips to help to get you ready:

1. Positive Attitude. A positive attitude sets the stage for the success. A bad attitude is guaranteed to take the process.

2. Preparation. Have an understanding of the issues you want to address in mediation. Having a basic understanding of your finances, children’s schedules, and children’s expenses will help you and the Mediator. Being prepared for mediation increases your chances of reaching a resolution.

3. Commitment. If you agree to participate in mediation, then commit to the process. It is tempting to “give up” when discussions get difficult, but staying the course is how you get to resolution. Problem solving is not easy but it can be done.

4. Breathe. Take things one step, moment and breath at a time.

How do I get started with mediation?

If you have a divorce or family matter to resolve, then consider working with a Mediator to resolve the issues before engaging in the Court process. If you are ready to proceed, then you can start with a Mediator if you have a Court Order directing you to mediation or if both parties agree to work with a private mediator.

Dovetail Conflict Resolution, LLC is a private mediation firm which requires either a Court Order or the agreement of both participants to engage in the process. With private mediation, the parties are required to sign an Engagement Agreement and pay a retainer for mediation services. Please contact us to start the process.